Curious faces, some familiar, some not so familiar, nervous glances and awkward nail-biting gestures. Day 1 of unanswered questions: “What the hell am I doing here?” “What is this all about?” and “Who are these people?” Past allegiances unite and cling desperately together for the comfort familiarity brings, the lone man sits in a corner silent.
TABS starts off like any new adventure, the nervousness, the hesitation, but grows on you, and close to you, until you’re part of “The family”. The message is simple, empowerment of young MSMs (Men who have sex with men), emphasis on “young”, because thoughts initially stray into lands of questioning how appropriate it is for some of these guys to be here, but really, isn’t it very appropriate for them to be in such a nurturing setting? The setting itself is safe and breeds freedom of expression.
I started off TABS just like the other person, the questions, the nervousness and the compromised comfort that new faces bring, but if humans could go to the moon (whether Neil Armstrong had us all fooled or not) then any challenge can be tackled head on, and that’s what I did. Defences up, sword and shield at ready, I tread onto the precarious emotional battlefield. Because initially, we all really were at war with ourselves, some passively putting up defences, others wearing a frown and disapproving body language like a bulletproof vest.
The trick of it all is having an open mind, making yourself vulnerable, and pulling the jig-saw pieces of your life apart to fit them together perfectly with a helping hand. See I believe Jamaica should be expecting a COLLASAL disaster anytime soon, with social decay cutting away at the moral fibre that holds this country together, so what if… What if someone comes along, someone more experienced, more knowledgeable, maybe someone sexy (which actually makes the attention grasping process easier than you’d imagine), better yet, what if a couple folks with that common goal of getting this country back on track come together, giving it a shot seems only humane.
In my capacities as a human and a flawed individual, I’m about to give it a go. Its your call now, mister.