Kevin sat around the oak table that had been in his family room for as long as he could remember, contemplating the previous two hours and how much his life had changed in such a short of a time spam. His family would come in soon to sit in the other chairs and lecture him, their judgmental glares would pierce him and he would become consumed by guilt and regret.The unrequited love he felt for Brandon seemed unforgiving and he considered how much it hurt knowing that he would never feel the same about him. The soft pink of Brandon’s lips served only as a reminder of how deceiving his affections were. The way his hair curled softly at the ends, how his eyes would penetrate him, and how the touch of his skin made him quiver. He had become consumed with lust and strange emotions he had never experienced with any of the forgettable girls he had loved before, or convinced himself that he loved.
It was the effect that Brandon had on him that made his senses null, he couldn’t hear his Mother’s Prado pulling up or the front door opening because Brandon had been whispering in his ear. Telling him how much he wanted him, trailing his tongue along the nape of his neck, and the only thing he could focus on – in that instant, was the quickening of his breaths and the small moans escaping from his desire.
His mother had walked in, and in seconds every truth he had known before was to be contested, everything he thought he knew about himself was to be proven and disproven. She too had heard the lavish sounds of sex, and her first thoughts were on her cheating husband. She had heard stories but now she would finally catch him in the act. Her reaction to what she saw afterwards was cold and calculated. She asked Brandon, who had been a close family friend – sleeping over with Kevin even before the boys were High school, to leave and to never see Kevin again.
Kevin got up.
“Where do you think you’re going?” his Mother asked walking in followed by his father and older brother Andrew.
“I was just going to,” “Shut up” she interrupted, “Sit down.” Mrs. Chambers glided into the dining room, her feet barely touching the cold of the floor and she sat at the opposite end of the table. Her husband and son sat sitting across from each other and then they all turned towards him. His mother’s face was marked by keen disgust, while his brother seemed upset at having to be there, because he had always known about Kevin’s sexuality but didn’t care. His father’s expression was most interesting, because his faced showed empathy and love for Kevin, but also fright. “Kevin we need to talk,” Mr. Chambers started up before his wife raised her hand to silence him too.
“How dare you. How dare you!” Mrs. Chambers slammed her fist into the table making a mark in the fine oak with her wedding ring, the diamond hardened by 20 years of marriage. “How dare you bring your filth into this house, do you know what the neighbors are going to say, do you know how much shame you have brought on us all?” She didn’t wait for a response, “You can just forget about getting that new cell phone, you should have thought about that before you entertained the idea of Brandon. And how long has this been going on? Have the two of you been playing sissy since prep school? Well answer me!”
“Oh, I can speak now?” Kevin retorted without thinking.
“Insolence!” Mrs. Chambers flew from her chair weightlessly and threw the vase that contained yesterday’s still freshly picked roses into the wall. Her husband held on to her hand and she turned towards him so violently he had to retreat his hold immediately. Andrew already tired of the melodramatic performances his Mother would host so frequently cursed loudly and got up from the table leaving her wide-eyed , “I don’t have time for this. Leave Kevin the f… alone.”
“You want to go, then go! I bet you’re just as nasty as him, go and run to the whorish nigger you dared to bring into this house as your girlfriend, filth, that’s what all of you are.”
Andrew slammed the door and left them at the table. Mrs. Chambers sat and pursed her lips. “Kevin, are you gay?”
“Kevin, I’m going to ask you again and this time I’m going to need you to tell me the truth. I want you to say it. I want you to say the words, I want you to tell us the disgusting life you have chosen and tell us how selfish you are, just like your fucking father. Are you gay?”
Suddenly the room went black, and the last thing Kevin could remember was the smell of Chanel No. 5
To be continued…