Gay men are a dynamic group of men but there are certain types of gay men who are idealized by media and portrayed in popular culture that lead to stereotypes and generalizations being made about all gay men. Here are five stereotypes gay men who break the mold are tired of.
1. We don’t all want to be your gay best friend
Young girls and mature women alike have taken on a strange fetishizing of the gay man as the ultimate best friend, they want us to help them to pick out clothes, to shop for accessories, paint their nails and to listen to their boyfriend drama. Not only does this reduce gay men to basic stereotypes but it perpetuates a belief that all gay men have similar interests. The truth is, many gay men have no interest in fashion, make-up or know how to do your hair. We are your friends, like all of your other friends.
2. We don’t want to meet all your gay friends, and unless we ask – don’t set us up with your “fabulous” cousin
In the same way that heterosexuals aren’t expected to get along better naturally because they’re the same sexual orientation, it is the same way that the assumption that gay men will get along with your friend because they are also gay wrong. That usually is not the situation, there is no need for fast-tracked friendships based on a shared love of the same sex. With that said, unless we explicitly ask – stop trying to play match maker.
3. We aren’t all obsessed with musicals and the theater
No. We aren’t.
4. We aren’t all sluts and we don’t have to take it up the butt
How often have you heard that all gay men are sluts with loose anal walls. In fact, there are a number of men who identify as gay but don’t have sex and an even greater amount of gay men who don’t participate in anal sex, you would be surprised at the number of ways gay men can bring each other to orgasm without penetration. We share sexual urges similar to other heterosexual men and women, science is still on the fence about the gay gene shared by all gay men that makes us c–k hungry and insatiable so for the time being, assume that we are just as slutty as the next straight guy.
5. We all refer to each other as she and girl, so you can too
Some of us do, but not all gay men. There’s an unwritten rule with the n word that allows other colored individuals to refer to each other ass nigga, a sentiment that would come across in a completely different way if it were used by a Caucasian. It is the same way with gay men, we sometimes refer to each other as slut, bitch, she and girl but it’s expressed with a shared sense of commonality which replaces the meaning with a sense of endearment that unless you’ve been privileged to, assume that the term is offensive and refer to us by our proper names.